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  • Lisa Bushman LPCC

The Recipe for Change

I often spend a lot of time reading books and listening to CDs and podcasts. I've really become interested in books by David R. Hawkins and what he has to say about our emotions. It helps me to understand the need to be consciously aware of my personal state versus being reactive.

You'll notice that in the above diagram, it is only when we are willing to have the courage to step out of our old patterns, that we move into the "happy and productive" stage. Below the level of 200, we are not in relationship with others and are focused on getting our own personal needs met. In these negative states, we are focused on the relationship with ourselves. We are often just having a conversation with ourselves about who we are, what we think about the world, and we get caught up in our own reality and our own thoughts.

Many people get stuck in the negative emotional states. They spend time trying to control and manipulate others and the external world, in order to regulate their internal emotions. They get stuck in the identification of who they are and what they "think" are their own limitations They often see themselves as separate and alone, and engage with their own thoughts about how things MUST be for me to be ok. These beliefs lead to playing defense not only with the world, but with ourselves. They become more focused on what they don't want to happen (fear based thinking), versus letting go and focusing on what they do want in their world. Their own lack of trust in themselves often creates an unwillingness to trust others.

Negative states often go hand in hand with self-hatred. This creates a negative soup that we live in and is counter productive to a state of happiness. Being constantly mad at ourselves, and staying small, does not help us be a better person. How we relate to ourselves has a direct impact on how we relate to others.

When we have courage, at the level of 200, we surrender our control and have a willingness to risk. By definition, courage is a state where we are willing to step into the unknown, and let go. It is a willingness to see the truth. We learn to self-activate versus relying on others to make us feel worthy. This helps us to move toward trust, and have a willingness to trust ourselves and begin to trust others. This is where we gain new information about ourselves. We now gain real feedback about ourselves through other's perspectives. We have moved beyond our own thoughts, and become active with the world.

Dorothy didn't get the witch's broom all by herself. She met others along the way, who not only helped her have courage, but needed the lesson of courage also. The movie is a great lesson on looking within ourselves to find the answers, and living in relationship with others. In the end, Dorothy had to walk through courage in order to understand that what she needed, she already had within herself.

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